Loosen up that tongue of yours

Title:  Loosen up that tongue of yours
Rating: Teen & Up
Series: Red Dead Redemption, Sex Pistols
Pairings/Couples: John Marston/Fujiwara Shirou
Part of: ABO Universe/Wolves without Teeth:  Set way into John & Shirou’s future
Beta: No Beta, all mistakes are my own
Summary: Curious, John asks Shirou a question and gets one in return, he’s just uncomfortable telling the Omega his past.  Sometimes he feels like he has to protect himself.
Notes: I started this a long time back, just been battling writers block once again and playing Red Dead Redemption 2 non stop.  So what I know in Red Dead Redemption 2 will slowly/maybe worked into this universe, not sure though.

 

“What were you like as a kid?”  John finds himself asking one night, the can of beer in his hand still cold, though it was half gone.  Turning towards the Omega on the couch, John watched as Shirou reach for his own can, swirling the can back and forth, taking a drink before he looked up at John to answer

“Besides being a “little shit”?”  Shirou laughed, remembering the first time he had been called that.

John chuckled, and nodded his head.  “Before you met me, I mean.”

Shirou took a sip of his beer before taking a deep breath.

“I guess a normal kid?  Shy. Didn’t have any real friends, other than the kids of my parent’s friends and they weren’t too friendly to begin with,” Shirou gave him a shrug of his shoulders.  “How about you, John?”

“There’s not much to say and some of it you may night like,” John turned his gaze away from Shirou to the can he held.  It wasn’t as though he ashamed of his past, it wasn’t something that he admitted freely to anyone. But Shirou wasn’t just anyone to him.  The younger man was his lover, his Omega that he wanted so much more than what he deserves.

Taking a deep breath, John tried not to let his embarrassment leak through to his voice.

“My mom died during childbirth when I was three.  Heard it all from my dad when he drank, which was more often than not.  He died when I was eight, which I was sent-” John paused, trying to find the right words before they huffed out.

“Just bounced from one group home to another, in trouble more than I should have been.  Ran away at fifteen, going from one friend’s couch to another. Finished school by the skin of my teeth, but that’s it.  Until I applied to work here, no one really gave me a chance,” downing the rest of the beer in the can before setting it onto the coffee table.

“You’ve been arrested before,” Shirou commented, setting the beer to the side and uncorking the bottle of fine bourbon that he had given John.  Pouring a finger of bourbon into a crystalized glass.

John took the offered glass, taking a sip and letting the flavor roll across his tongue.

Nodding his head at Shirou’s words, he spoke up.

“Several times and most of the time, I deserved it.  It was tough, but I met a few people that taught me a some lessons,” John looked out of the corner of his eye as he tried to judge Shirou’s expression.

“Scared yet?”  He found himself taunting, his lips curled as he fell back on a way to protect himself.  “Have I ruined your image of me?”

Uncomfortable in the silence and the way Shirou just calmly sat there, as though he wasn’t disgusted by his admission.  Swallowing back the rest of the bourbon, ignoring the rich burning on his tongue, John hissed and put the glass back onto the coffee table.

“What do you want me to say, John?  That all the attraction that I’ve felt, the want and need, the love that I have for you.  That everything I have been feeling since I was a child, that it would just disappear in finding out what you went through?”  Shirou asked, setting the can of beer to set next to the glass that John had set down, his tone changing from curiosity to steel, dropping down a pitch.  “Do you think so little of me that this would drive me away?”

John found himself pressed against the couch, strength that he had seen a few times keeping him in place as his body froze.  Weight against his lap as Shirou settled himself in place, reaching to wrap his arms around John’s neck.

“Does it shock me?  Not really, John,” Shirou gave him a smile that hinted towards sadness.  “I’ve been around people who pretend to like me. Pretend to be my friend in order to get what they wanted.  You, John? You’re the only person who seems real to me. There’s no pretending from you.”

John could only swallow, listening while gritting the back of his teeth.  He couldn’t describe the feeling that was moving across his skin, wanting both to relax and to stiffen.  Fingers that threaded through the hair at the base of his neck, the sharp pull of his attention back to the Omega on his lap.

“You know what it’s like being used, and you haven’t used me to get what you want.  Sure, you used my body, but I wanted you to,” Shirou pointed out when John opened his mouth to speak.  “So let me ask you. Do you honestly think I would care that you’ve been arrested?”

Taking a deep breath, looking into Shirou’s eyes as he set his jaw and turned his gaze away, uncomfortable with the range of emotions that ran through him as the younger man watched him.

“Yeah, I did.  Look. I’ve seen the people that hang around your parents, their friends.  Look at me,” John demanded, trying to fight the urge to just bottle everything up and pretend that nothing was wrong and that Shirou was just projecting.

Shirou pressed his lips, unimpressed.  “I am looking at you and do you want to know what I see?  I see a man that has never lied to me. A man that treats women with respect.  You treat me with respect.  An Alpha that doesn’t look his nose down at me because I’m an Omega.  You, John, you make-”

Though John knew that Shirou was trying and almost succeeding in showing that he wasn’t affected, it was the tiniest hint of a tremor in the Omega’s voice.  How Shirou’s body became just a little more tense, feeling nervousness that his lover was feeling.

“You make every day something new for me.  I think about how if you were serious about chasing me away when I was younger.  Everyday, I used to wake in fear thinking this would be the day that you want to settle down, that you don’t want someone everyone joked about around here.”

Shirou dropped his head on John’s shoulder, hunching his shoulders.

“So what if my parents friends are like that?  I’m not my parents friends. I’m not my parents,” Shirou’s words were muffled in the shirt that John wore.  “Do you know, John, that those friends of my parents would think nothing of ruining someone just because someone showed some weakness?  I- no one can be themselves around people like that.  They’ll use whatever they can to tear you down.”

Words caught in his throat, John found himself wrapping his arms around Shirou’s back.  Turning his head enough to nose dark hair, breathing in Omega’s pheromones as he listened to Shirou.

“I don’t have to pretend to be someone else around you.  You don’t tear me or others down for your entertainment. Stern?  Yeah, harsh at times. But John- being here with you, I’ve never been this happy before.”

John caught the hitch in Shirou’s breath, the push of a nose against his neck.  Waiting a moment, John tried to pull back when Shirou burrowed further into his embrace.

“They do horrible things, when they want something and aren’t used to being denied.  I don’t want to,” Shirou whispered, hunching forward into the Alpha’s body. Shaking of a head, John slid his hand to cup the back of Shirou’s head as his own body tensed.  Years of knowing Shirou, watching the young boy grow into an Adult. Weakness such as this was never shown around him.

He’d never seen Shirou act like this.

Trying to get rid of the cotton mouth feeling, John swallowed before he asked

“Did they do things like that to you?”  His voice low, rough around the words he spoke.  The body in his lap stiffened for a moment before his hand came up to rest between Shirou’s shoulder blades.  Just a presence that had the Omega giving a nod.

“They tried-  I mean, well-”  Shirou took a breath.  “People wanted me to, breeding.  Prostitution in the hopes of having a child.  I didn’t want that, I want yours,” Shirou’s words drifted off.

Pressing his lips to keep himself from asking about that.  He won’t deny that he thought of a chance of having a child, be it with another Omega or even a Beta while the desire to see his Omega pregnant and heavy with a- their child.  The fact that the amount of times they’ve fucked, there wasn’t even a hint of pregnancy.

Struggling to come to terms of what the younger man had confessed, the rush of emotions that he didn’t want to deal with.  Instead of trying to comfort his lover, words that got caught on his tongue, John slid his hand down to Shirou’s neck to give the base of the male’s neck a squeeze.

The huff of Shirou’s breath, the way the Omega curled closer to him.  Losing track of how much time had passed, John could feel lips by his ear.  Words spoken softly, spreading the warmth through his body at the declaration.  Breathing through his nose, huffing out a warm breath against Shirou’s neck as the Omega’s body went slack.  He didn’t have to look to see that the younger man had fallen asleep.

Mulling over what Shirou had told him, dropping the hand away from the base of his lover’s neck before resting the back of his head on the couch cushion.  The insecurities and confusion with everything that Shirou told him, the admittance of a world he hadn’t thought of and the threats that borderline rape.

The weight of Shirou on his lap borderlining on the side of uncomfortable, John waited a moment before lifting his lover off of him and back to the other side of the couch.  Reaching over to pour himself another finger of bourbon, cupping the glass between his hands. A chuckle rose up in the back of his throat, one that became strangled before swallowing it back down, tossing back the liquor.

For years he thought that the younger Omega had everything laid out before him and sure, most likely still does.  Making him pretend that he wasn’t ashamed of his upbringing. He didn’t admit that if Shirou’s parents hadn’t hired him, he would have gotten into further trouble, if not prison.  Wouldn’t have known the frustrations that the Omega would put him through.

Wouldn’t know the feeling of being loved.

Ignoring the way the back of his throat tightened at the thoughts of love, John pushed himself onto his feet to clear away the cans and glass.  Tossing the empty cans into the trash and the glass into the sink, John returned to the couch and paused.  The memories of having Shirou bent over the back of the couch, fingertips that traced scars and railed along skin.  Scents that built up between them, mixture of both Alpha and Omega.

Feeling his face flush, John gave Shirou’s shoulder a shake to wake his lover up, urging the younger male to move.  He didn’t entertain thoughts of the future, even if part of himself wanted to.